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Eat Your Hiking Partner to Stay Alive – Essential Wilderness Skill

Consuming your hiking partner to stay alive isn’t as easy as finding a handful of grubs under a log. But rest easy, this video will show you how to find the choicest cuts on a freshly expired hiker. 

Blizzards, forest fires, bears, and annoying hiking partners are all challenges faced when venturing in to the great outdoors. Getting lost, however, is perhaps one of the most stressful situations of all.

You’re cold, disoriented, tired, thirsty, and hungry. What will you do?

The video below has just the answer if your partner happens to be less fortunate than you. See how to turn that 100-plus-pound corpse at your disposal in to a life sustaining feast.

As can be seen in the video, there are multiple options for obtaining the “choicest” cuts from a hiking partner once a few basic precautionary rules are observed, such as making sure your partner is actually dead before consuming them.

Another good tip, though not covered in this video, is to mark any area on your body that you wish your hiking partner to not eat, should you become the host.

Hopefully you enjoyed this spoof video making light of a very disturbing question.

Remember to call dibs on the tri-tips on your next group outing.



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Eat Your Hiking Partner to Stay Alive – Essential Wilderness Skill